Being a parent can be hard, like way harder than anyone ever honestly tells you. In any given day you can find yourself bombarded by every imaginable emotion, and most of them will be caused by your kids in some way. They make us happy and proud, busting with love and laughing with joy one minute. Then in the next they can make us want to cry with frustration or tiredness. They can stress us out with constant nagging, or even make us down right angry with their naughty attitude or arguing. And all of that is totally normal and just part of parenthood.
Elian’s attitude has been particularly trying on occasions recently, he’s 5 years old and honestly sometimes acts more like a teenager. And Effie…well if you follow my stories on Instagram you will know that Effie is particularly difficult at the moment, she is pretty much determined to be attached to me at all times, and she screams blue murder if she isn’t! She is also insanely naughty and testing boundaries continuously. She tips things, throws things, ignores most of the stuff you say to her and climbs everywhere. So I am generally touched out and stressed out by the end of the day (or by lunch times somedays! haha!)
But I know I need to find ways to allow myself to calm down (Ive found a few great tips and tricks for helping to reduce my anxiety on www.rollingpaper.com), relax a little, feel less stressed and centre myself emotionally to get up and keep going every day as parents do. So I have a few sure fire ways that I know will help calm me down if I can grab a few minutes of me time alone…usually when the kids are in bed, or if Jon is able to take over parenting for a little bit.
Breathe
It may sound completely ridiculous, but simply taking a few deep focussed breaths can make the world of difference if you start to feel yourself getting worked up. If you heart rate is starting to rise then focussing on slowing your breathing can really help calm you down.
If you wanted to take this a step further you could even consider some focussed breathing meditation – You will find lots of guides on YouTube. Or looking into different breathing techniques as there are a number of methods which can be used to help ease anxiety and stress.
Talk it out
Talking over your feelings can be a great stress reliever. Being able to be honest and open with someone else, explain your feelings, even analyse and discuss what is causing the stress, and maybe receive feedback that you’re doing great can really help. Owning up to your feelings, and admitting you are stressed or anxious can be the first step to calming yourself down.
Take a bath
A simple relaxing hot bath will help relax your whole body, allow your mind to calm itself and release any tension in your muscles. Adding some essential oils or a nice bubble bath with notes of lavender, sandalwood or clary sage are the best for tackling stress and anxiety.
Get out into nature
Surrounding yourself with nature is a great way to calm down. Simply getting some fresh air and a change of scenery can do you the world of good, and being somewhere new can really help interrupt anxious thoughts and allow you to calm down.
Read a book
Reading is one of my favourite things to do when I know I need to step away from everyday life and it’s stresses. Allowing my mind to wander to another world and properly immerse myself in a storyline is the perfect way to stop stressing about my own life. Even grabbing a 5 or 10 minute read while sitting in the car waiting for Elian to finish school can make me feel better and less anxious. Find a genre you really love, or choose an easy chick lit that doesn’t require too much brain power to read.
Listen to music or a podcast
Music is another thing that has the power to transport you somewhere else. Either play some calming music or if you’d rather pop on your favourite track and crack up the volume and just let yourself enjoy the music. Listening to music can have a very calming effect on the body.
Distract yourself with something you enjoy
Now this is dependant person to person, but spending a few minutes doing something you enjoy is a great way to give yourself a little TLC and make yourself happy. This could be getting creative or crafting, baking or cooking, gardening or even cleaning your car…whatever it is that you actually enjoy doing, find a little time to do it for yourself.
Personally I’m partial to an online game or 2 if I really want to try and switch off for a bit. Sometimes I’ll play something on my phone or other times I’ll use sites like Solitaire.org where I have lots of options of different games. I enjoy Pyramid Solitaire as its quick and simple to play but still requires my brain to focus. Or I love their daily word searches. they have loads of different daily games depending on what you enjoy. I find a game allows me to distract my brain from whatever I am stressing about and totally focus on something else. With the word search its almost the monotony of scanning row after row to find the letters that allows my mind to calm and focus completely.
Journal
Journalling, especially bullet journalling, has become quite a big hobby for many in recent years. Whether you fancy keeping a diary of day to day life or a gratitude journal of what you’re thankful for, writing down your thoughts and feeling are a great way to work through your anxieties and relieve stress. Being able to asses and sort through your feelings, get any negative thoughts out of your head and on to paper is a great exercise to help clear your mind and allow for evaluation of your feelings
Exercise
Now this may not be one for everyone, but exercise is a great way to relieve stress. You gain focus when exercising as your mind and body need to stay on track with the physical activity you are participating in. It helps you clear your mind of any worries you may have. If you’re doing an exercise like boxing or martial arts you can physically punch out your stress and get a relief you need.